“In applying for a passport renewal, all was going well until I found that a full birth certificate was required,” writes Ross MacPherson of Seaforth. “A cursory search was unsuccessful, so there was nothing for it but to apply for another. To obtain said certificate I had to supply various forms of identification, one of which was my current passport! So to get a new passport, my old passport, which by itself was not enough to get a renewal, was used to obtain a birth certificate which will then be used to obtain the new passport. Sir Humphrey would be delighted.”

“Will new kid on the block, Sarah Moaney (C8) join with perennial favourites Laura Norder and Jobson Growth?” asks Nicholas Triggs of Katoomba. We’re not sure. Hang on while we consult Mal, Jono and Vic.

Richard Murnane’s regrettable retail experience (C8) had Warren Menteith of Bali proclaiming, ”Bugger the emphasis, what’s erythritol? And why is it 99 times more desirable than the juice of some obscure Indonesia fruit?”

It’s about time we heard a positive hospital toast saga (C8) and for that, we thank Lenette Allen of Dubbo: “Shout out to the toast served at Sheehan House Maternity Unit at Tumut Hospital in 1979, 1981 and 1982, made by the midwife and served with tea, directly after assisting with the birth, whatever time of the day or night. The thick toast from locally made bread lathered in melting butter is an award that Donald Trump will never receive, no matter how much manipulation he undertakes. Deo Gratis.”

Noted mother of invention, Anthony Lopes of Sans Souci “just read a review in The Guide of a program on SBS called What Not to Eat, [Next to a review of This Tastes Funny – Granny] and its sobering last sentence. Reminds me of the old saying – All the good things in life are either Illegal, Immoral or Fattening!”

“Recently, I was scrolling through an online clothing store when I came across a sale on wireless bras,” reports Mary Carde of Parrearra (Qld). “Now, like many of Granny’s more ‘mature’ fans, slowly but surely, I’ve learned to appreciate the advantages of wireless technology with its convenience and flexibility giving us more mobility and freedom. But the mind boggles when such newfangled technology starts being adapted to clothing. Does that mean we now don’t have to worry about robots replacing us?”

Column8@smh.com.au

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