Let’s get one thing straight.

Former Wallabies second-rower Peter FitzSimons does not have a bad word to say about Alan Jones’ talents as a rugby coach. FitzSimons played under Jones at the Manly Rugby Club, and in 2017 touted him as a potential Waratahs coach, which he said would have the double benefit of getting him off the airwaves.

Peter FitzSimons said he was proud of a denigrating remark he once made about Alan Jones.Wolter Peeters

Let’s get two things straight.

Former 2UE presenter and current Herald columnist Peter FitzSimons does not have a good word to say about Alan Jones as a broadcaster. In 2018, he wrote that Jones was “a malignant tumour on the body politic of this city, this state and this country, and the sooner he is excised the better”.

Reminded of this comment on Thursday, he nodded approvingly.

“I’m very proud of that quote,” he said.

Now let’s get this story straight.

The witness Peter Fitzsimons told the Downing Centre Local Court on Thursday that Jones’ 2GB colleague Ray Hadley in 2019 put him in touch with a man who said Jones had kissed him and touched his penis in a manner that was unwanted and non-consensual. FitzSimons planned to meet the man and bring along his colleague, investigative journalist Kate McClymont, but the man panicked before that happened and McClymont did not talk to him for another four years.

FitzSimons’ testimony on Thursday brought Jones face to face with yet another old foe, in a line-up of witnesses that has ranged from toe-curlingly obsequious to implacably belligerent. FitzSimons hulked into court in a crumpled cream suit, while Jones wore his navy blazer with soft red check, and carried a silk handkerchief in the top pocket

Familiar with arcane and bewildering rules from his rugby days, FitzSimons appeared to appreciate that his every utterance may fall into touch, and to be acutely aware that he was the only player in the arena who did not have a copy of the handbook.

Peter FitzSimons does not have a bad word to say about Alan Jones’ talents as a rugby coach.Wolter Peeters

No sooner than after he uttered his oath he turned to the judge for guidance. “If I’m not sure how I answer, may I ask you?” he asked.

Then he was back onto the field, ready for the lineout, listening for the whistle, interrupting his own evidence to ask the Crown whether he could keep talking or needed to wait for a new question.

He could not be expected to know that this trial has been more akin to an American NFL game when it comes to the frequency of interruptions in play. Jones’ barrister Gabrielle Bashir, SC, is particularly agile on her feet. For those interested in the stats, she reached a frequency of one objection for every four or five questions when Jones’ friend was being grilled earlier in the week over allegations that he made light of the broadcaster fondling a staffer under the table.

But FitzSimons took great interest in the objections and the reasons for them, as though he might be able to avoid them if he knew the rules. When Judge Glenn Walsh shot down one objection on the basis that the question to FitzSimons had not been “unduly repetitive”, FitzSimons again addressed the judge. “Excuse me your honour, unduly what?”

Back in 2019, he checked in with McClymont during their inquiries into Jones with an email titled “match report”. Now he found himself in game combat, this time with Bashir, who pressed into the minutiae of what he had said, when and to whom, with a level of detail he struggled to entertain.

“What is this dangerous sentence I’m accused of removing?” he asked Bashir when she pressed him on a detail missing from his report to police, then talked over the top of her as she continued to ask the question. “No, excuse me,” he said. Bashir appealed to the judge to intervene. “Your Honour, in terms of … ?” FitzSimons stepped back. “I’m ready. Please repeat the question.”

In the scheme of the trial, FitzSimons was a minor witness, whose evidence could never go higher than demonstrating whether the complainant “C” had offered a consistent account of what he said happened to him, and it was over within a day.

The most surprising exchange of the day, however, occurred not in the witness box but outside court, where television reporters chancing their luck on some colourful footage for their evening bulletins asked Jones if FitzSimons was any good as a rugby player.

The old coach rocked back in laughter. “That’s the best question I’ve had,” he replied. Which was not really an answer at all.

Support is available from the National Sexual Assault, Domestic Family Violence Counselling Service at 1800RESPECT (1800 737 732) or the Men’s Referral Service on 1300 766 491.

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