Trump’s Cabinet may be having a very different experience on the porcelain throne than the rest of America.

Health Secretary Robert F. Kennedy Jr. and Vice President JD Vance are among the senior officials embracing a diet that promises weight loss, glowing skin — and, perhaps most eyebrow-raising of all, “nearly orgasmic” poops.

Yes, really. That’s how going No. 2 should feel, according to Dr. Sean O’Mara, who developed the eating plan he says primes the gut to produce bowel movements that are fast, odorless and even wipe-free.

“When you start eating healthy, you don’t need toilet paper,” O’Mara told the New York Times Magazine. “Animals in…

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