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“Not old (C8), just confused,” says Meri Will of Baulkham Hills. “I’ve been informed that my church’s payroll and HR systems will be inaccessible for three weeks while the transfer to a new service provider takes place. Timesheets and leave applications during this time must be submitted via paper forms. Sounds refreshingly simple, except that the only address given is an email one.”
“A colleague told me recently that what made him feel old was his son announcing that he had applied for a Seniors Card,” adds Jim Pollitt of Wahroonga. Ann Clydsdale of Bathurst got it when running into a former student: “They had their grandchildren with them, and said children were well past the toddler stage.”
Helen Lewin of Tumbi Umbi is familiar with copping a different lingo abroad (C8): “Back in 1982 we did a tour of a Schloss overlooking Salzburg. It was done in German but could have been Greek to me. Some weeks later while looking for something to do on a rainy day in Cognac (just drinking was out of the question) we went to the local cinema to rewatch Star Wars. Majorly disappointed to discover Luke and Han had been dubbed into French.” Étoile de la Mort approche!
The naming of the Australian Underwater Hockey team (C8) continues, starting with John Perry of Newtown: “May I suggest The Australian Fur Sealaroos? Shortened to AFSes if the full title is too much of a mouthful?”, while both Roz Millar of Moss Vale and Bart Fielden of Avoca Beach are keen on The Platypuses, with Roz suggesting The Plats for short. Add an extra T, and you’re looking at a potential sponsorship with the added possibility of free board shorts.
We were pondering the suitability of the beloved monotreme when Don Bain of Port Macquarie came along: “As unique to our continent as the kangaroo or the wallaby, is the platypus, and, when I discovered that a platypus can remain underwater for a full half-minute, unaided, it suggested itself as a fitting nickname for the national underwater hockey team. Needless to say, The Platypussies held no appeal, but an indigenous name for our duck-billed amphibian rang true. Let’s hear it for The Boondaburras!”
Stephanie Edwards of Leichhardt issues a hearty congratulation to Ted Bugarski (C8) “on reaching the age of needing reading glasses but still having a head of hair requiring shampoo and conditioner!”
Column8@smh.com.au
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